Navigating the Dark Night of the Soul – With Spirit

My spiritual awakening unfolded as it does for many of us: propelled by a very dark night of my soul. At the time, it was terrible. I sometimes felt like I could not breathe. I had no idea how I had gotten to that place. I felt extreme anxiety.

But it turns out that it was just what I needed–and indeed, even what I had asked for.

First, my marriage became untenable. And then, it became heartbreaking. In the face of separation and divorce, I turned to God in a whole new way. And I turned inward in ways I had never done before. I began to lean on faith, and hope, and the God of my understanding. I sought wisdom from the world’s faith traditions. I found yoga in a whole new way–and the practices that yoga teaches, like breathing and centering and quieting the mind, began to lift me, began to be grounding rods in my darkness. I am so thankful for yoga, and yoga teachers, who hold space for healing and opening and awakening. It’s why I also became a yoga teacher through this time.

But the biggest gifts of all came through persistence, through seeking, through connecting inwardly and upward to a higher realm. It is through deep guidance from my angel realm that I cracked open even deeper secrets to who I AM, who I have been, and most importantly, who I am becoming each day on this Earth.

We are always in a process of becoming, you see. And we are not powerless. In fact, we are powerful beyond measure. We are our own creators. But we usually do not know this. We rarely ever hear this.

Through my trials, I reclaimed my power. For me, it came little by little. Small, new awarenesses that led to greater discoveries of self. One breath at a time. One meditation at a time. One healing at a time.

And along the way, I learned that I have tremendous healing abilities. I learned that I was healing my own path, and I began to share new truths and healing with others. And slowly, I found great strength and abilities in working with others, as well. And I found a love of sharing what I find works, what I find as Truth.

My angel guides are always by my side. They show me how to be like them. They teach me compassion in a world that needs it so. They teach me how to see myself the way they see me. They guide me in working with my family and my clients. They show me that we are always on a journey of evolving, if we want to, and they show me how magical it can be to surrender to the light inside of me that connects with the light all around, and the light in others.

I would not trade my dark nights for anything. They propelled me to BE who I am today. And I did not ever for a moment do it alone. Instead I found help in the most unexpected places, through friends, mentors, and angels. I know that’s a strange one for lots of people, but it’s truth. I remember the times that I really worked to take that in – that angels are real. That they are here, for ME.

They are here for you, as well. I am so fortunate to be blessed with gifts of helping others awaken to their angel connections. It always happens when the time is just right. When the stars align, and the human reawakens and connects with Spirit and says, “Let’s do something differently now!”

This awakening is beautiful. It is a process of remembering.

Are you remembering who you really are? Are you curious? Do you seek guidance on this journey? If so, let’s talk.

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Yoga = Spiritual Connection

This is a photo of me taken in the Chapel of our beautiful church, St. Luke’s United Methodist in Highlands Ranch, where I get to teach yoga. I am grateful for the openness we have now to blend Eastern teaching and practices with our own. It is a true gift.

And this leads me to share a little story about my yoga journey:

I am many aspects: A woman, a wife, a mother, a teacher, a healer. And, I am a yoga teacher. Yoga found me right when I needed it.

I remember very vividly the Wednesday morning over a decade ago when I lay in savasana after a beautiful and intense ashtanga vinyasa class, and it came to me: This, I need. This serves me. This is part of my path to healing.

I saw in my vision very clearly four distinct things I needed at that moment in time: Yoga; My Family and Friends; A Spiritual Practice; and, God. It was laid out as a grid, in four side-by-side boxes. Those four things.

At the time I was working and raising our young daughters and I was able to squeeze in one yoga class on Wednesday mornings, and I did, faithfully, because it made me feel so good.

In some of those classes, I had profound experiences and insights. I released. I loosened my grip on myself and my life. I began to breathe, at long last, in a way that I had not breathed since I was younger, before I had children and the responsibilities of a family…and, in my story, a dysfunctional marriage that grew more dysfunctional as stress built.

Yoga found me when I needed it most. My teacher, Jen, had such a profoundly calming influence on me that I needed right at that time. I needed to let in the wisdom she found and shared. It was so much sharing about what was going on in her journey, that resonated with me on mine. That’s because we find each other when we need to. We need to hear each other’s stories. That’s why we’re here. To experience and live our own stories, and then to share them, and help each other out, and create more stories. It’s a beautiful, communal cycle.

Of course much of it happens internally, just for us. And much of it happens even in the very sharing of our stories and our lives and our authentic selves. There’s glistening energetic shifts in the sharing that happens between us. It’s pure magic.

Now I am a teacher, and share stories, and encourage my clients to share theirs. There’s no beginning, and no end. There is a beautiful journey, Divinely guided, and when we let in the light for ourselves, we see a little more clearly, day by day. That’s how I see it.

And yoga — the word means to ‘yoke’ the mind, body, and spirit — helps us get into ourselves so that we shine light in there, and explore, and release, and bring in, and heal.

One of my Spirit guides with whom I work closely is Paramahansa Yogananda. He wrote “Autobiography of a Yogi.” He brought yoga to America. I am so grateful to him for that gift to us, and for his continued service and support.

And I am grateful for each of my yoga teachers along this way. Each has shared a piece of her or his journey, to add to mine. What a beautiful circle of giving it is.


Yoga for Healing: Workshop @ Hamptons Yoga Fest

I taught a workshop on yoga for healing on September 18, 2015 at the inaugural Hamptons Yoga Fest.

My workshop was inspired by the tools and intention I learned and came to rely on heavily as I underwent three surgeries for breast cancer in 2013.

My goal in teaching this type of yoga is to inspire individuals with the knowing that we are not powerless when faced with a health or healing issues. And there are tools and options we can even share with loved ones, off the mat in quiet settings. Much of the journey is about mindful intention: setting the intent to heal. The rest focuses on calling upon energies to guide us in healing, through prayer and meditation, mantra, energy therapy, etc.

Hamptons HeaderThis wonderful festival was the perfect setting for the workshop and I h ope to return in 2016! It was dedicated to community, celebration, healing. What could be better?